Ladies, what is with this trend of saying “I feel” rather than “I think”? I have been seeing it in articles all over social media and hearing it daily (like this one) . I admit I have picked up the feel-y trend as well. Every time I do it I cringe and remind myself that “I think” is a much stronger statement than “I feel”. If you know something is fact just state the damn obvious. Drop the “I thinks” and the “I feels” all together and say it with confidence. Honestly switching I “think” with I “feel” just weakens your opinion and voice. Unless you truly are talking about feelings.
For example, if you have to use a fuzzy disclaimer because you are telling half-truths when repeating a story, say “I think”. You don’t FEEL a person said (blank), you THINK they said (blank). You don’t FEEL the person was wearing a red shirt, you THINK they were. The level of intensity you want to remember this switch depends on how seriously you want to be perceived. How much confidence do you have in what you are saying? When I hear someone say “I feel” (first I cringe) and instantly start to wonder if they are feeling or thinking. Then I lose track of the substance behind their statement. When I hear “I think” I perk up and prepare for a debate, but I am paying attention to their statement. When someone states exactly what they mean I instinctively believe them because they sound strong in their statement, I may not believe them for long if they can’t support their opinion but they have an advantage in the beginning.
You have to contemplate how to maneuver your statements in a professional setting. If you are being interviewed, would you really say “I feel” rather than “I think”? The interviewer is going to hand the job over to the person with stronger convictions and knows their own mind. If women fall into the habit of using the weakest verb when stating their mind, their opinion is forgotten before they are even heard.
I have noticed this trend with women mostly and it saddens me because we are already looked over in many aspects of the professional world. Lets stop the trend and start thinking, better yet, KNOWING our own minds.